Peter Viney's Blog

A political rant 14 June 2024

It was inevitable that the election campaign would descend to the Four Yorkshiremen Sketch.

SUNAK: I was so deprived we never had Sky.
STARMER: Luxury! I was so deprived that I had a frayed carpet and a crack in the window.

You couldn’t make it up. Both betray a lack of social awareness.

In the 1980s and 1990s, before Sky hi-jacked British sport, Sky satellite dishes were a sign of a council estate or poorer area. Who watches TV all day? The unemployed, the aged, those who are disabled or ill. Any TV dealership would tell you that TV innovations; VHS video, satellite TV, widescreens, DVD, blu-ray, large OLED TVs, Netflix, Disney Plus always sell initially in poorer areas. None of them are particularly expensive in the scheme of things. The wealthy have other entertainment options. Sunak hasn’t sussed this.

Then poor Keir’s frayed carpet and cracked windows. King Charles could say much the same. I’ve been in Buckingham Palace. I’ve filmed in two stately homes and one near stately home. Frayed carpets and cracked windows are standard. They inherit the carpets. You’ll see ten year old Volvos and twenty year old Land Rovers parked outside, not new S Class Mercedes or designer Range Rovers. Michael Hesseltine was sneered at by the Tory grandees because ‘he had to buy his own furniture.’ Much like Starmer, his wealth came from his own hard work.

We have Crittall 1912 windows. We have five cracked panes. I can’t get a glazier to fix them. They only do PVC double glazing now. They’re not interested.

On the plus side, both are men of educational achievement, unlike ‘Two grade Es Corbyn.’ Sunak is template Tory leader – Oxford PPE. Starmer did his BA at Leeds, but Postgrad at Oxford. So the tradition of Oxford Prime Ministers continues whatever.

There was a joke applied first to Diane Abbott, then to Nick Clegg:
A: (He/She) will never become Prime Minister.
B: Why? Is it because (She’s black / He’s LibDem)?
A: Good lord, no! It’s because (she / he) went to Cambridge!

I watched the 13 June TV debate. One tires fast of Rayner and Mordaunt squabbling. A crucial question was on whether we would ever rejoin the EU: Rayner, Mordaunt and Farage were all adamant “no.” I have never forgiven Labour for failing to oppose Brexit.  With Rayner (a keen Corbynista) still around, I never will. I had noted that Starmer had personally voted Remain and had hopes for him. I’m not a grammar pedant, in spite of years of writing text books, but I wish Rayner knew the difference between a past tense and a past participle. Then again, she tries as hard as she can to sound ignorant. She is not, of course. There’s a pattern. President Bush Jnr did the same. Even Barack Obama found it necessary to pepper speeches with a few aint’s. Mordaunt needs to learn that a simples ‘Taxes – taxes – taxes’ chant suggests that the public would rather have the NHS finally crumble before stumping up a couple of pence in the pound.

I also can’t accept the simple ‘Revenge politics’ of VAT on private education. We all know that if every private school closed tomorrow, there is no way the state system could accommodate the kids. Also the money needed to provide the extra places, buildings and teachers would far outweigh the gains on VAT. If parents choose private, they are saving the state a great deal of money. It obviously doesn’t add up financially, but also “revenge” is not a political policy I could countenance.

Nor is social engineering. The Greens had someone on radio circa 2022  saying they wanted to eliminate gas boilers by 2025. This indicates utter stupidity by the speaker. Then on campuses there is a campaign for plant only catering. I’ve been vegetarian (I’m not now) but it is not my business what someone else wants to eat. The Greens are Eco-fascists.

Then the Lib Dems. Around us they are pouring millions into bike lanes. £7.6 million in Ferndown for one or two bikes in half an hour. Months of road closures. The whole party seems dominated by lycra clad males pursuing their own sport at our expense.

The Lib Dems have pledged to allow local authorities to raise council tax on second homes by 500 per cent. We’ve never had a second home, and I agree that a 50% additional rates would be a reasonable idea in rural and tourist areas where locals are being out-priced, but 500%? That’s ludicrous virtue signalling. Of course Ed Davey conjures up the farm worker in the Cotswolds or Cornwall with a care home worker (pull the heartstrings) wife, who can’t afford to buy a hovel locally. OK, but is that all there is?

Who would be exempt? MPs? They need two homes. Take that as read. Then a neighbour was made redundant, got a job in London, had three kids who were happy at local schools, so travelled up Monday and back Friday, and bought a studio flat. We know a friend whose son has a modest flat locally to visit his parents. What about second homes abroad? Could they be counted as first homes, and the home in the UK charged? What will you do about opposition deputy leaders who fiddle the taxes on selling a second home? You know the one. She was ranting on TV about politicians who break the law by having a glass of wine and a packet of crisps during Covid.

In the department of wild ideas, take Sunak’s sudden plan for conscription. Supposedly this will appeal to retired colonels in Tunbridge Wells and retired sergeant-majors in red wall Redcar. Hang on, I’m old, but my generation never saw conscription. Why would it appeal to me? So it will be at 18 replacing the gap year. Rishi, not everyone goes to university. What about those who left school at 16 and have an apprenticeship, or just a job they like? What about those who already have kids at 18? Will everyone have to stop what they’re doing for a year? Who will staff it? Won’t they need buildings? What will be the tower of administration to register people? Will you be able to get a sick note? Will flat feet get someone off? Mainly, will you get paid? It may have been a pittance, but conscripts to the forces were paid.

Wild promises backfire. Jonathan Freedland points out in the Guardian (16 June) that Labour’s promise of ‘free broadband for everyone’ in 2019 was so patently absurd that it put people off. (Will I get a free computer to operate it? Can I have an iMac not a PC? I live five miles from the nearest connection point.)

I know the obvious rejoinder to all this, is ‘The NHS is my greatest priority.’ So, Labour promise 100,000 dental appointments for kids. About 20% of the population is under 16 (a number that is dropping fast).

OK, 12 million are under 16. There will be 100,000 extra appointments. That means ONE IN 120 KIDS will get an added appointment. In other words the promise is total bullshit.

Then PR, Proportional representation. Labour and Conservative would form a coalition together before they ever countenanced it. It is said that Cameron and Brown discussed this in 2010, in fear of the Lib Dems demanding it as the price of coalition. The SNP and Plaid Cymru avoided the question, as both also benefit massively from the first past the post system. At least the SNP was crystal clear on the EU (and right).

I fear Lib Dems and Greens remain voices in the wilderness on the two big issues for me: The EU and PR.

I so wish we had the Australian option. None of the above.