Peter Viney's Blog

Jangle Bells: shopping for Christmas … or “A Child’s Christmas in Tesco”

I don’t mean shopping for presents, but food shopping. So much of the UK is closed, dead except for the New Year Sales (many starting on Boxing Day, the 26^th), between December 24^th and January 2^nd. There was always an impetus to stock up as if for a siege.

There’s always the mega day. Usually it’s the 23^rd, but this year it seems to be Sunday 22^nd. We went to Waitrose – they let people in early before the tills opened at ten. Not too bad, but it was the jangled day. The tension was in the air. People were rushing about, stretching suddenly in front of you to grab stuff from shelves as if all two hundred packs of brussels sprouts might disappear before their eyes (or you might take them all, leaving them bereft), looking distracted, clashing trolleys. Buying multiple packs of long life semi-baked baguettes and ciabatta. Wondering whether four two kilo packs of King Edwards, four jars of goose fat, three packs of parsnips, three of carrots, five large packs of sprouts would stretch for six people.

Then there are the people (by which here I mainly mean men)  who rarely visit supermarkets. In our division of labour, I do most of our food shopping (but don’t know how to turn on the washing machine), but many men don’t. The sensible thing is to leave them in the car with a newspaper, but often they’re being led about, getting in the way, looking in amazement at the goods on display. It was only a few years ago that I was talking to a pension advisor. He said he was going to buy lots of Asda shares.
‘Why?’ I asked.
‘Asda’s absolutely wonderful. Do you realize they sell fresh pizza?’
I was perplexed, ‘They all do … um, how long is it since you’ve been in a large supermarket?”
It turned out to be several years.

I thought it had generally calmed down, as longer supermarket hours, seven days a week shopping, 24 hour major stores had spread the rush and panic out. All the stores are open again on the 27^th and the “Express” local stores are often open on Christmas Day. I’m told the staff argue for the privilege of working for double time plus a day in lieu. If you come from a community that celebrates on Christmas Eve, or does not celebrate at all, it’s a bonus to work on the 25^th. A nurse told me that so many volunteer to work in hospitals that they need a lottery. (Which also indicates how few nurses are British).

Twenty-five years ago with limited shopping hours, the mega shopping day in Tesco or Sainsburys meant a one-hour queue, with lines stretching to the back of the store. Due to the British affection for Marks & Spencer turkey, their mega day was usually Christmas Eve morning. Supermarkets had people with tins of chocolates offering them to those in the queue, though a Valium would have been more useful. It was stressful. I’ve never forgiven Sainsburys for one bit of sanctimonious ticking off.

We had two kids with us, two large trolleys totally full and overflowing. This is 25 years ago long before anyone thought about plastic bags … don’t get me started on plastic bags. American supermarkets use paper and pack it for you. In Marks & Spencer clothes departments they say, “Do you want a plastic bag for 10p?”
“Yes, I do. I’m not walking out piled with underpants, socks and sweaters.”
Yet go over the road and many, many clothes stores use paper bags and have done so for years.

So, usually in those days there was a stack of bags and you helped yourself. The woman on the check-out said:
‘We have a new policy to avoid waste.  People are only half-filling bags. You can only have two bags at a time. We will give you more when they are full.”
I said, “There are four of us to pack, two trolleys. We have waited fifty minutes. Others are waiting. I’d like more so we can pack faster …”
“Don’t you care about the future of the planet?” she said sharply.
I hate to admit that I said, “Put more bags out or you can go and put everything on these trolleys back on the shelves, while I go to Tesco.”
I meant it. She did.

Today was summed up in Waitrose when we went down to the car park. Someone had abandoned their trolley against our back bumper. Two more trolleys were left behind cars rather than being taken just twenty yards to the trolley park. Panic! I go there most Sundays (because of the free Sunday Times) and I’ve never seen people do that before … just push their trolley behind the neighbouring car and drive off.

Jangle bells … jangle bells
Jangle all the way